about a creeper

you know the type

first they act like a friend,

they they disappear, then they reappear

when you are low, down, and downer

plagued and troubled by insecurities…

watch out!

you and your friends are always

transitional prey until he moves to some other

distraction

he’s a creeper, and he craves the tension

within your mind, it sits heavily —

a secret whispering mouth, sends

its message only to your ears

you try to outrun him

people won’t believe you

so you hide in dark rooms

you get up and run when

gossip-mongers sell fish at your door

but you’re never    quite       fast                   enough

you are afraid of what

forgiveness brings.

wish fulfillment

guess what?

that’s what!

magic happens when everybody is looking

and nobody is expecting

and everybody is hoping

and everybody is wanting

and everybody is dreaming

things i thought about today

roller coasters and stress

validation and domestic violence

farts and thin doors

cigarettes and black youth

settlement and no settlement

intimacy and commitment

miscommunication and other people’s phone conversations

vitamin water and phone chargers

glass tupperware and gossip girl

lamb kebab and land use

interns and the undeniables

clean towels and automatic security lights

dishes piling up and hope

selflessness and annoying organizers

brilliance and selfishness

disappointment and truth

horrible and accountability

freedom from my mind

effed

let me tell you why i am writing right now!

because i had a miserable fucking day full of stress

but i’m still standing

and i had to apologize to more people

than i remember having to apologize to

ever…and i’m a little down about having to work

so hard and getting criticism left and right

left and right

i hate it.  i hate that somebody i respect might

think a little less of me.  and that the long-term

consequences are outpacing the short term wins.

and i’m rambling.  but this is not a poem.

IT IS A RANT!

funky new advice column

unclench your sharp teeth before they become dulled

below lies the knowledge of mothers passed onto daughters

when passing a yellow bug whose shiny hump disturbs

honk your horn like this _____ __ _____ — — —

at southern california grocery stores stocking up on

cereal, broccoli, lemons, tomatoes, zucchini, and such

double bag

the same goes for having sex with well-strapped strangers

about that situation at work

involving a co-worker and a trapeze artist

remember first to close the door as you call your 5th grade friend

to monger about rumors and complain about office sex

try not to reminisce, leaning over a dropped pistachio

a little brother’s taunt, eyes glinting, yelling into the mic

“crack kills!”

about poetry, there are certain Friends who will recite

the book of psalms when you are thinking about sufis,

this is similar to fortune cookies becoming Chinese

as white people using chopsticks read the following:

“you will have great success, but you must try harder.”

make sure you whisper nikki giovanni in your lover’s ear

after you’ve dragged the hair of hafiz into bed

about falling asleep to nonsense blogged as advice

don’t tell people too much information when you can hold

it all inside, your body is your bowl.

do not laugh at anything i have said,

it is without question that you and i must set

some boundaries.

second city

red planet rotating to the sound of drums

women in wide-brimmed hats with gloved hands

pressed over mouths whispering wildly about spectacle

“how celestial!”    “unbelievable!”    “terrifying, really!”

epic cheering heard over the scent of flushed bodies

stars groaning as they lift their weight in gold dust

skyscrapers marvel at the curvature of the sun’s beefy biceps

drum rolls, trumpets, and hereafter pronouncements aside

the observation of unsmudged glasses, journalist pens

poised over notebooks, redacting all uninteresting plots

sits a dusty woman, deliberately

peeling a banana on a bus bench

waiting for this world to pass

a case of the lonelys

it happens all the time

after a long day, when you’ve been super successful

at everything you put your hand to

after everybody, that friend who’s always single

and partying, has multiplied themselves into a couple,

you’re pushing buttons on a tv remote

you’re eating the gourmet meal you’ve made

from scratch — you know — to treat yourself

you burp, and ain’t nobody you can apologize to

when you’re soul-talking with your friends

and suddenly you’re distracted by the lonelys

when you’ve read a good book, and you

sympathize with the tragic arc

so you post about it, a bunch of people

you don’t know very well — “like” it —

after a performance, a poem, when you’ve put it all

out on the line and you’ve touched a life

when everybody tells you how amazing

how powerful, how handsome/pretty, how smart

you really are, and you’ve come home

to a clock that’s changing its face

every minute

it happens all the time

after a long day, when everything you’ve done

has crashed and burned to shit and you want to hide

but you know you absolutely cannot hide

from yourself, so you smile with your mouth

while your eyes pull a bit at the corners

after a long day,

you drink in the loneliness

you somehow always find your heart

between the spaces of your breath.

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